My BedRoom Scoop

Falling out of love with your Beau?

2010-05-13T10:36:00.000-07:00

So I was reading an article the other day with a lady who for some reason has fallen out of love with her husband of of 18years.. For a while I kept on saying "oh boy-life is so funny." ... But how does one "Fall out of Love?"I think it's simple and sometimes happen without one even noticing.

I always say that it's the little things that actually make a relationship work.

Communication
Honesty
Understanding
Compromise
Appreciation
Love, and last but not close to the least
RESPECT.

Along with these come the little perks that brings the smiles, giggles and of course the charm that will eventually spice up your bedroom life. As i said "little perks"which means you don't need to go out and spend off the grocery money to buy expensive gifts. Try showing the love by:

Making time SEX (If not intercourse, please take part in a little foreplay)
A kiss before you leave in the mornings/evenings for work
A reminder text message to say "I Love You"or "You mean the World to me"
A red lollipop for her when you get home from work.
Cuddling to watch a movie at home.
A funny handmade card made by you and the kids expressing your appreciation
A colorful complement.eg.. "You look gorgeous in that dress honey.., Babe that suit was made just for you handsome!" Oh honey this dinner is super awesome'' If you get the picture.

But I must say Scoopers that a dull relationship will ultimately lead to a dull love. Suddenly you start being with each other because of the kids, or the convenience of having a partner (Oh I'm married).

Unfortunately as soon as we start taking these little things lightly then the relationship will start to get thirsty and the love will dry out, the attraction for each other will fade and so will everything else until you start asking yourselves..."How Did This Happen? Then you will be too late.

I know you have a lot to say so please go ahead and share your thoughts and advice to all of us Scoopers.

Cheers!
Nikx

Bringing Back the Oomph in the BedRoom After Childbirth

2010-03-18T11:27:00.000-07:00

Oomph? Yep, we mean Sex...and don't we all need a little of that to soothe our minds, soul and body after our little bundle of joy starts to take over our world? But how soon should we start to 'tangle' after such intimate, life changing event? Or how do we balance sex and child at the same time.. hmmm.. this could be tricky but if you want to keep that flame alive and hold on to your man then u better be ready to get ready.

As a mom I can attest to this being a difficult task with a crying, extremely demanding little bundle of joy and the after effects that childbirth physically and psychologically has on your life.

When to have start having sex after baby in partially up to you and your body but you may also want to include your practitioner. Growing up I was told to give your body at least 3 months to heal properly but after having my child I realized that it all depends on your body and every body and childbirth is different.

To get to the chase. If you are not exactly ready, your partner may not share the same sentiments after all he's a "guy"lol. So please do not neglect your partner's need for some sexual gratification.

There are so many things you could do to keep ignite the aflame.

Cuddle with him: There is absolutely nothing wrong with just lying in bed together, cuddling,hugging, kissing and sharing baby stories, who knows this may just end up in something further to both your liking.

Do have Foreplay: I know time is hard to find sometimes but intercourse can be painful too especially for mother's who have had a cesarean or some may have been torn or slit...after all we are talking about the same parties involved in bringing forth your beautiful baby so yes guys, ease off a lil or take your time.

Get Naughty: There is nothing wrong with a little naughtiness in your love life. As a matter of fact it is very important in your relationship. It helps to bring a little oomph to your love life.Strip tease him, sext him when he is at work, and as Heidi Murkoff says in 'What To Expect When You're Expecting' "' Try oral sex more often" it is less painful and very pleasurable.

Do Quickies! With crazy days of exhaustion, crying fits, late night feedings, quickies may feel like heaven sometimes. It worked for Kimberly Ford, author of Hump: True Tales of Sex After Kids, who claims that even brief intimate episodes release frustration, leave her feeling closer to her husband, and keep the flame alive for future rolls in the hay. Surely this will not be forever, but for the first couple of months it will definitely work.

Kegel Exercise is also very important even after childbirth as stretched perineal muscles will likely cause intercourse and orgasm to be less pleasurable.

Don't be surprised if you suddenly start noticing a lack of vaginal lubrication after giving birth. Reduced estrogen levels after pregnancy sometimes result in vaginal dryness, which can last up to 6 months. Surely this may cause some discomfort during sex. So in these cases you may want to try different vaginal lubricants or as I mentioned before, massage or oral sex is an alternative until you are more desirous.

There are so many other simple things you can do but that may take me another post. In the meantime. Communicate with your partner, be honest with your feelings and continue to show your love and appreciation of each other.

Talk to you all soon.. and please feel free to share your tips on bringing back the Oomph in thr Bedroom after Childbirth.

Cheers!

Story also featured on www.jamaicanmommies.blogspot.com
"

Jealousy...The Damnations it may cause To your love life!

2010-03-11T10:11:00.000-08:00

If you say that you have never been jealous at some point in your life or relationship, then I must say that you probably have never loved or been in love. I usually say that jealousy is inevitable. It happens in your family among sibling and parents..{you know like who is getting more attention or more allowance}. it happens in school with your friends and finally it happens in your relationship.

But is a little jealousy all that bad? I absolutely positively do not think so. I personally think that when I get a little jealous it only reminds me how much I am still crazy in love with my beau. But jealousy become a damnation to yourself, your partner and your relationship when it starts to control your mind and takes over your independent thinking ability.

When you realize that you are becoming extremely jealous, it means that there is a problem in your love life and you need to take drastic measures to correct it before it escalates. I know we sometimes suspect some "anky panky" with our spouse and instead of asking about it for clarification we start our little investigation. We search phones, wallets, secretly listen in on conversations, we even sometimes follow our partners our hire private investigators to record his/her activities.

All of this can be avoided sometimes with good communication and honesty. If you are the one suspicious of your partner let him know and talk about the reasons for your suspicions. If your partner is suspicious of you then as soon as you realize open up to your partner. I know guys have a way to get a kick out of tagging us along instead of just telling us the truth.

But I do hope that after you confront your partner he is truthful and you try to trust his words but if not then that's a different story all by it self.

Talk soon and do feel free to share your tips with us.
Nikx

Ever Felt like Just Screaming?

2010-03-08T11:25:00.000-08:00

Have you ever felt like your life is not really yours sometimes?
Have you ever felt like you want to crawl under a rock?
Have you ever felt like you are fighting a losing battle?
Have you ever felt like you can never do anything right?
Have you ever felt like you've just had enough?

If your answer is No then you are one lucky champ. In a relationship there are: Good days, Extremely good days, Sad days, Bad days, Not so bad days and 'I want to scream days'. Yea.. I know I am in a relationship and ladies you may agree that sometimes you just have to be a mother and wife for your man and child/children and it is just makes you want to hold your head and scream. Then there are other issues like bills, siblings, parents, in-laws, sex... and blah..blah..blah. Whoa!

Well the good thing is that these days don't usually last forever and it is good to know that it will be over soon.
As i always say God will never give me more than I can manage and i do try to use that to console myself when i feel a bit overwhelmed.

I am a woman, a mother, a girlfriend and I have been overwhelmed a number of times, but at the end of the day i realize that I have a beautiful family-my little girl who I love like no other, a spouse who loves me endlessly and a caring extended group of family and friends for support. So when I am down i try to think of the positives and Give God thanks for the blessing he has given to me.

But then there are others who do not have the support system they need, if you are one of them I advise you to find a channel to let out your anger, scream, cry, sing,write, dance, exercise, talk to the wall or talk to us here at My BedRoomScoop. Whatever you do, do not keep it in because that may lead to serious longterm depression.

Check out this weeks Video: According to you By Arianthi

Cheers Scoopers

I Think I Love Him More Than He Loves Me!

2010-03-02T13:06:00.000-08:00

Lately I have been conversing with a few of my friends and I realize that this 'unequal Love thing' has been infecting quite a number of people both men and women. Have you ever been in a relationship and feel like you are loving your spouse way more than you are being loved? It may not be love, but it could be care, attention, loyal, in any case.. it makes you depressed and frustrated.

You most times feel unappreciated because you think that your putting in more than you are getting. At some point in any relationship we all do feel that way and I must say it is not a good feeling. I am a great believer in good communication and i believe that as soon as a problem surfaces in your relationship you should communicate it to your partner before it escalates.

Escalates? Yes, sometimes it's the tiniest things that lead to a big gap in the relationship and as such the bedroom activities become dull and dry. Feeling unloved and unappreciated is not a feeling that one should live with and I do advice every individual, man or woman to not settle for less than you deserve.

However, feelings could be wrong or misleading so please, please, please communicate and be honest with your partner and remember do not fight fire with fire, it pays to be humble sometimes.

Keep on showing the love, care and appreciation there is a 90% chance it will return to you.

Bless up Scoopers!

If My Life Was A Song..

2010-02-19T10:49:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I would choose 'Me' by TamiaWhat Would Yours Be?

Forum to talk your mind is here!

2010-02-19T10:41:00.000-08:00

Hey Scoopers!

You have been asking for a way to interact with each other, reply to each other's comments and share your thoughts instead of just commenting on my post. Ask no more because I have found a simple way to integrate that in the 'Scoop's Page' in the form of a forum. All you need to do is scroll down to the bottom of this page where you see the Forum entitled "My BedRoom Drama". You can create a profile, upload links and photos, post a scoop, comment on other people's scoop and share the love.

This will not work if you don't participate so start blogging. My First scooper for the forum is "Bell" Thumbs up Bell!!... She is seeking advice on a problem she is having in her bedroom, please do not hesitate to read and share her pain withe the scooper's love.

In the meantime, you too can follow Bell's example and share your thoughts, joys, pain and frustrations. remember you dont need to use your real name of photo for privacy purposes.

One love My Scooper Family
Nikx

Exposing Your Past Can Either Make or Break Your Love Life..

2010-02-16T11:14:00.000-08:00

Secrets.... Secrets... Secrets... When Does it end?

So they say that there should be no secrets in a relationship, but what exactly qualifies as secret here: your detailed past or the fact that you cheated on him when you both were going through a tough time in your relationship?

I strongly believe that couples should be open to each other in their relationship however, I do believe that some things about each other's previous relationship/past should remain in the past as sometimes if you reveal certain aspects of your life it may comes back to bite you. It doesn't matter how much you love and trust each other as long as it does not affect your present relationship it should just stay in the past.

But this is just wishful thinking right? Certainly we want to know everything about our partner's past. But do we really need to know every single detail? I don't think so. My Grandma always say "what you don't know won't hurt you". and she used to say to that we should "never open up our past relationship with our current spouse". But is not opening about certain details about your past causing a problem in your relations?

Guys I would like to hear what you think about this. Ladies tell me your stories if you have ever been in this situation.

Cheers!!!

Valentines Day is Over Let's Keep the Love Alive

2010-02-15T09:54:00.000-08:00

Hey Scoopers!
Finally the big day has come and gone.. don't let the magic or spice in your love life go with it too. Keep on doing the little thing to remind your partner how special they are and will always be to you. Ladies if you didn't get a gift please don't hold a grudge he probably didn't have any money and is working on something extra special on his pay week...LoL. Keep on spreading the love my Scoopers and keep visiting for more exciting scoop.

Cheers!!
One Love
Nikx

Ladies, Valentines Day is for Men Too...Pamper and be Pampered!

2010-02-04T12:04:00.000-08:00

Hmmm... So as ladies we sometimes think that we should be the only one treated, pampered and opening gifts, but as they say 'it takes two hands to clap'. So I am begging you to make your men feel loved too on this special day...Valentines Day.

Remember most times is not how expensive or what you do, rather it is how you do it and the effort and passion you put in it. men are usually not fussy, we are the fussy and expensive character in the relationship, no offense that's allowed.,,

View these simple inexpensive ideas to treat your man on February 14.

Romantic Massage Night for two with red wine, scented candles complemented by some of his favorite midnight snacks. . Of course you will be the masseuse.
A Private Dance (You being the dancer and the man the audience). Make sure you put on something sexy and teasing to play the role.
A nice home made dinner (For those of us who can cook).
Souvenirs please show some romantic tastes in your choices ladies.
Send personalized cards with your own words and designs and possibly and photo for his eyes only.

I'm sure you have some ideas of your own. Please feel free to share them with the Scooper Sistas as we share the love.

Check out some of the Dos and Don'ts for Valentines Day.

Celebrating Valentines Day

2010-02-04T11:05:00.000-08:00

'Tis the season to declare your love and be declared by your love... Ha, Ha! lol . Valentines day is in one of my favourite days in the year simply because its a time when lovers world over unite to celebrate the love they have for that special person. Sometimes for some couples its the only time they get to hear the words 'I love you'..(sad face) from their significant other.

So if you are in a relationship please make an extra effort to make your love one feel s pecial on that day. For get about the argument you just had or your friends who wants t go have a drink or go clubbing and reserve that moment for you and yours.

If you not sure of gift ideas you may check out a few a few of the following ideas i will be posting soon.

In the meantime check out these Sexy Affordable Lingeries or a girl's best friend.

Talk to you soon guys when i will be showing you some simple ideas to wow your love on valentines day..

How To Avoid Arguments In Your Relationship

2010-02-01T13:43:00.000-08:00

Arguments are a must in any type of relationship. However, it is our duty as spouses to try and minimize our often they occur. The following are just a few ways to help you avoid arguments in your relationship hence more time to spend on spicing up your bedroom life.

Become each other's friend. It is said that relationships that started out as friendship usually last longer.

Do things together. Play, do chores together, shop together, sport, travel and even cry.

Be honest with each other. Communication plays a key role in every type of relationship. Tell each other exactly how you feel about things that bother you. Also do not jump to the conclusion that you are being attacked or get too defensive when your partner shares things he/she doesn't like about you.

Do not fight fire with fire. If your partner is upset about something. Give him time to steam off then you make your comment. Trying to make him the bad guy at all times do not work it only cause more problem.

Admit when you are wrong and Apologize. Saying 'I am sorry' is kind of hard to do in the beginning(speaking from experience) but once you start practicing it you will realize that it gets easier and it makes life easier too in your relation.

Try to empathize- or put yourself in your partner's shoes to see how he/she is feeling and then see how you would feel in that same situation and respond to him how you wtould have liked him to response to you.
Learn to forgive and forget - This isn't always easy but if you try to move forward after an argument has been resolved it will make things much easier for you in the future. Holding a grudge only brings more bitterness and despise in your love life.

Kiss and Make up. This is the easiest part and am sure you know just how to do that.

I have tried those tips myself and they do work, but if you have another tip please feel free to share with us.

What's Keeping You From Walking Out Of A Miserable Relationship?

2010-02-01T06:47:00.000-08:00

If you are in this situation then I am sure you have asked yourself this question a thousand time already. Surely you may come up with maybe one or two answers such as:
1. The Kids 2.
Financial Stability
3. Good Sex
4. Blah, Blah, Blah
You could try to work on your relationship if you think change will come for any of the above reasons. But Might i add that while you are doing that you are wasting some very precious moments and years of your life. A friend tell me once that a dog will always be a dog so it doesn't matter how much you dress him up and treat him like a baby he will always remain a dog and not a child. Hmmmm... On the other hand, if I was to ask you why you want to leave your relationship you would would be able to write me a 10 page essay and more. You probably will say most of these reasons:
1. He/she is never there when I need him most.
2. I am not appreciated.
3. I am making all the compromise.
4. I am verbally and physically abused.
5. He/she cheats on me left, right and center.

Can you think of anymore? .... I'm sure you can.
Sometimes as women we face so many of these problems and we keep them to ourselves and let them drive us crazy when all we need is to say.."Enough is Enough, I am out of here". Trust me in circumstances like these, packing a bag is the easiest thing to do. As a mom break up would be the last thing i would wish on myself because i believe that kids should be grown in a strong loving family with both parents. So if you have kids I do empathize with you, But remember that if you are miserable your kids are going to be miserable and happy kids learn better and grow with high self esteem and self confidence.. One Love all.

Welcome

1999-01-09T17:35:00.000-08:00

Welcome To My BedRoom Scoop! “Scoop?” that’s right! This is where we will be uncovering the tricks and secrets to spice up the magic in your bedroom.Believe it or not, whatever is happening or Not happening in your relationship is reflected in your Bedroom. My BedRoom Scoop is all about sharing the tips, experiences (Good or bad) and basically finding answers to maintain a fun-loving and exciting life in your bedroom; hence a fantastic relationship...I am Nikx... and I believe in bedroom excitement, fun, adventures, romance and the positive list goes on and on. How do we get all of this is your bedroom…? Let’s find out... Take a look at our exciting topics, hear what others are going through and see how u can empathize, encourage or learn from it.

What would you do if your partner is not pleasing you sexually?

2010-01-28T12:08:00.000-08:00

So I was at hair salon the other day with a friend of mine and sexual pleasure was the talk of the day and i decided to share some of these concerns with you guys. If you are in a situation where you are practically fed up of your sex life to the point where you are considering other options then you need to take drastic actions.

I always say "No Play.....No Way". Hmmmm but each situation is different. It could be that the woman is not satisfied with the man or the man not satisfied with the woman. In any case their is trouble in the water...

So the main topic was that this lady in her early forties is married to this man in his late sixties hmmm. Her problem is that it does matter what she does, she can't get her husband to "rise to the occasion"or when he does he is back down after 3 minutes and as a result he is miserable, withdrawn and tries to avoid her anytime he suspect she is coming on to her.

Of course she asked me what I would do and I was like "huh? oh me? Wow!" The only thing I could have said was that maybe he is too anxious or that he has a lot on his mind... but I just wanted to tell her that honey he is just too old and cold..lol.

So my Scoopers I am putting it out to you.. What would you do?

How to Get over a Breakup

2010-01-28T11:30:00.000-08:00

Going through a break up and you feel like your world has just ended? News flash, you have a new era to begin! So wake honey!

Breaking up with someone means giving up a very intimate part of your life that was very special to you and is a very long and rocky road. Wether you are the dumper or the 'dumpee', getting over a break up can be one of the hardest challenge one can ever go through but doing it is crucial necessity.

Majority of women have experience this at some point in out lives so I am sure you are familiar with the heart aches and pains that comes with it.

However, we must accept that life does go on and that everything happens for a reason. Who knows, maybe the break up was exactly what you need.

Though I may not be an expert on breakup, I do have a few tips to share as I have been down that road before as both a dumper and a dumpee. Talk about tears, i could cry you a river, bitterness, that was me.

But I have come to realize that there is not one set way to heal a broken heart so what may work for you may not work for me and vice versa. However, I do know that first we need to face the reality.
You can cry, scream, throw things, run swim or sleep if that's what u need to breathe at first then do it. Guys usually refuse to cry because they think it is not manly or they think it makes them look weak but I for one always think it takes great strength for a man to break down and cry.
When you are done with all that i thin you should try these steps.

Accept it
Share it with friends family and be honest about your feeling.
Believe that you can be happy again and even happier
Spend time and invest in yourself. Find a hobby so that you can feel good, look good enjoy you again.
Then set realistic goals.

Good luck and remember to tell us what worked for you.

Getting back into love groove after a break-up

2010-01-28T10:56:00.000-08:00

Break up is never an easy road. It brings with it great emotional and sometimes physical pain. Some of us may go into serious depression after a break up which cause us to withdraw from others ,cry our eyes out, turn to alcohol or other drugs, neglect our kids and the list goes on and on.

Often times we say this statement..."I will never love again". But is that really true? Has that worked for you? I do not think so. But how do we get back in to the love grove again? I believe that the best way to do this is to have an open mind. Explore, believe in ourself and learn from our past mistakes and the mistake of others.

I will also encourage you to remind yourself of how special you are and that there is a possibility that you will get hurt again the difference is that you will be stronger, smarter and ready.

In the meantime check out the following article on how to get back in the grove after a break up.
http://www.100bestdatingsites.com/blog/2008/dating-after-divorce-50-tips-to-get-back-into-the-groove/

Dealing with the step children

2010-01-27T10:38:00.000-08:00

Many people men and women like myself prefer to be the first and only parent of their spouse's kids. Unfortunately that is not always the case. In some situation the kids are adorable and they will make things really easy for your relationship. while in other cases the step kids make your life a living hell. I do not have any step kids but i have friends who have been and are still having constant fights in their relationship because of their step kid/s.

These problems most times stem from the fact that the child thinks the step parent doesn't have a say where discipline is concern and when they are rude you have to be extremely careful what you say or do so that your partner do not bite your head off.

Please bear in mind that I adore children as i am also a mother of a beautiful lil girl. I also believe that there are some step parent who make life a living hell for the step kids. But neither of these situations are perfect but i believe that the adult should do the adult thing in any situation.

For help in these situations you may visit the following links.

htt://www.advicefromtheblender.com

http://everything2.com/title/10+Ways+of+dealing+with+Stepchildren

http://kidshealth.org/kid/feeling/home_family/blended.html

The Magic of Respect in a relationship

2010-01-27T09:44:00.000-08:00

Some may say that "Oh i can say anything to him/her any how or anywhere i want and he cant do anything.."Sound familiar? I must tell you that you are dead wrong. Respect goes a far way in a relationship. My grandma used to say that 'manners carry you through the world' and i think that if we apply it in our relationship it will reduce a lot of the arguments.. Always remember it takes to make a quarrel and sometimes it's the simplest things turn into a big 'prawl'.

Look out for more talks on this topic.

Love Making After Cheating

2010-01-26T11:58:00.000-08:00

Many often times say that make up sex is the sweetest, that may be true when you are making up after a quarrel over "not closing the toilet seat"or "refusing to make dinner". As it relates to cheating I think that is a whole different ball game. I for one think of cheating as one of the worse thing my partner could ever do.
It's not just the sex, but rather the visuals that i would have in my head and I am not sure if i would be able to deal with that.
I just think that if one feels the need to cheat then it's time to either work on the relationship or pack one's bag.

If you want to have a Life After Cheating with your spouse then you are going to have to work extremely hard. But @ the end of the day you need to ask yourself if it is really worth it.

Dealing with The Ex.

2010-01-24T13:20:00.000-08:00

It is nice sometimes to have someone who is well experienced with bedroom activities and as such are very open minded and fun loving. But, that usually comes with a flaw- the EX. Some Exes fail to realize that they are actually the Past and not the Present and as such chose to become a constant pain in your relationship. But I believe that if my spouse is not putting her in her place then it is my job to take a stand.

How Soon is too Soon?

2010-01-24T13:11:00.000-08:00

Decing on the right time to have sex when dating has always been a conflicting topic. As a teen I always thought that there should be at least a year or more of dating before the "Big Bang" because two people should know the inside out of each other before they actually start getting too intimate. However, as i become older I get to realize that that is not always the case.

They are couples who have been dating for years before sex and as soon as they start having sex things get sour and they break up. While there are other couples who have sex even the first time they net and for some miraculous reason they are still together for years to come.

I still believe that couples should start out as friends first, but what i do not agree with is for others to be too judgemental of others when they do not follow the "norm"" because at the end of the day it all comes down to personality.

He is Always on the Road

2010-01-23T13:22:00.000-08:00

Funny i was jut talking to a friend who was just sharing her pain in her relationship that led me to rite this scoop. There are some men who expect the woman in the relationship to do everything right but on the other hand they fail to do one of the most important thing which is spending quality time with the woman. They are always on the road "with friends' and when they do come home they are sometimes too 'tired' to say hello or they try to find fault with everything just to start a quarrel.

It is always hard to console a sister when you don't know what to say sometimes. So my Scoopers if you have or are experiencing such crisis in your bedroom let us know and share ideas to deal or as I always say 'Get Out while you can!'.
.

How Do I Save My Relationship?

2010-01-22T11:11:00.000-08:00

I have always believed in the theories of the “Better Good” and “The End justifies the means”. Therefore if I am placed in any situation where I have two choices A) walk away, or B) Stay and fight. Then I usually ask myself.

 “Why should I even bother?

 Will the end result worth my time and effort?

So I want you to ask yourselves those two questions and if you can figure that it is worth your while then I say, you better fight with all you’ve got. This is one method you could try. I call it "My TryGonometry".

First I would like you to follow these few steps.

Find the problem… To fix a computer you first have to know what is wrong with it because you cannot change the keyboard hoping that you will see the input clearer on the monitor, so is it with a relationship. Therefore you need to ask yourself; what problems am I having in my relationship? I want you to draw up a table with four columns and amount of rows of your choice. In the first column I want you to write in the word Strengths, in the second column Weaknesses. Once this is done you can positively move forward to the next step which is
Analyzing the problem/s: By now you would realize if your weaknesses way outweigh the strengths or vice versa and most importantly is if your relationship is worth trying save. If it is not then pack your things and run!! However, if you think it is still worth it then I want you to take the next step with me which is Analyzing these relationship weaknesses. So I want you to label the next column My Solutions. In this column I want you to write how you would want those problems to be resolved. After your have done that I want you to take the next step to saving your relationship thus bringing back the spice in your bedroom.

Sharing your thoughts: To do this you have to be very careful and act wisely. Always remember that respect goes a far way in any type of relationship. To share your thoughts on the relationship problems you need to chose the right place and the right time. Please do not just attack your partner about the relationship problems, that would only bring you more unsolicited problems and you do not need that. You may want to bring these up when both of you are cuddled in bed, or over a quiet private dinner etc. Just make sure it is somewhere cozy and mind settling. Then you need to know how to bring up the topic, after you bring it up find a way to show him your list and then you discuss calmly and respectfully. While discussing you need to:
Listen while your partner speaks: please do not interrupt your spouse while he/she is talking. Make your notes if you need to then speak when it is your time. Also know that you should always give eye contact it is a common courtesy when someone is speaking to you, it show that you are actually interested even if you are not. This does not mean stare.
Never shout when you feel you're being attacked: this may be difficult but if your partner need to lash out please allow it, then respond calmly and appropriately so that he knows you are trying to make a positive difference. When he is done shouting then you may want to add a forth column labeled “Our Solutions” so both of you can work on it together.

Compromise: This has always been a hard task in most relationships. Sometimes One individual may think that the compromise is one sided and that is not fair. Only you can decide what is fair but to solve any problems there has to be some reasoned compromise.

Bury the Past: Please do not continue to bring up these problems in future confrontation because if you do then all the steps you just took would be for nothing. Learn to forgive and try to forget if you can because as we say,, No One Wants To be Alone or Live Miserable in a Relationship. Good Luck and look out for more Articles. In the mean time check out our scoop of the day!

Searching his Phone?

2010-01-21T11:07:00.000-08:00

Who is calling such late hours and soo often? Who is he texting? Can't wait for him to go take a shower so I can take a peak... Hmmm sounds familiar? Do you think it is right? Why don't you just ask him?