Falling out of love with your Beau?

So I was reading an article the other day with a lady who for some reason has fallen out of love with her husband of of 18years.. For a while I kept on saying "oh boy-life is so funny." ... But how does one "Fall out of Love?"I think it's simple and sometimes happen without one even noticing.

I always say that it's the little things that actually make a relationship work.

• Communication
• Honesty
• Understanding
• Compromise
• Appreciation
• Love, and last but not close to the least
• RESPECT. 

Along with these come the little perks that brings the smiles, giggles and of course the charm that will eventually spice up your bedroom life. As i said "little perks"which means you don't need to go out and spend off the grocery money to buy expensive gifts. Try showing the love by:

• Making time SEX (If not intercourse, please take part in a little foreplay)
• A kiss before you leave in the mornings/evenings for work
• A reminder text message to say "I Love You"or "You mean the World to me"
• A red lollipop for her when you get home from work.
• Cuddling to watch a movie at home.
• A funny handmade card made by you and the kids expressing your appreciation
• A colorful complement.eg.. "You look gorgeous in that dress honey.., Babe that suit was made just for you handsome!" Oh honey this dinner is super awesome'' If you get the picture.

But I must say Scoopers that a dull relationship will ultimately lead to a dull love. Suddenly you start being with each other because of the kids, or the convenience of having a partner (Oh I'm married).

Unfortunately as soon as we start taking these little things lightly then the relationship will start to get thirsty and the love will dry out, the attraction for each other will fade and so will everything else until you start asking yourselves..."How Did This Happen? Then you will be too late.

I know you have a lot to say so please go ahead and share your thoughts and advice to all of us Scoopers.

Cheers!
Nikx

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Bringing Back the Oomph in the BedRoom After Childbirth

Oomph? Yep, we mean Sex...and don't we all need a little of that to soothe our minds, soul and body after our little bundle of joy starts to take over our world? But how soon should we start to 'tangle' after such intimate, life changing event? Or how do we balance sex and child at the same time.. hmmm.. this could be tricky but if you want to keep that flame alive and hold on to your man then u better be ready to get ready.

As a mom I can attest to this being a difficult task with a crying, extremely demanding little bundle of joy and the after effects that childbirth physically and psychologically has on your life.

When to have start having sex after baby in partially up to you and your body but you may also want to include your practitioner. Growing up I was told to give your body at least 3 months to heal properly but after having my child I realized that it all depends on your body and every body and childbirth is different.

To get to the chase. If you are not exactly ready, your partner may not share the same sentiments after all he's a "guy"lol. So please do not neglect your partner's need for some sexual gratification.

There are so many things you could do to keep ignite the aflame.

• Cuddle with him: There is absolutely nothing wrong with just lying in bed together, cuddling,hugging, kissing and sharing baby stories, who knows this may just end up in something further to both your liking. 

• Do have Foreplay: I know time is hard to find sometimes but intercourse can be painful too especially for mother's who have had a cesarean or some may have been torn or slit...after all we are talking about the same parties involved in bringing forth your beautiful baby so yes guys, ease off a lil or take your time.

• Get Naughty: There is nothing wrong with a little naughtiness in your love life. As a matter of fact it is very important in your relationship. It helps to bring a little oomph to your love life.Strip tease him, sext him when he is at work, and as Heidi Murkoff says in 'What To Expect When You're Expecting' "' Try oral sex more often" it is less painful and very pleasurable.

• Do Quickies! With crazy days of exhaustion, crying fits, late night feedings, quickies may feel like heaven sometimes. It worked for Kimberly Ford, author of Hump: True Tales of Sex After Kids, who claims that even brief intimate episodes release frustration, leave her feeling closer to her husband, and keep the flame alive for future rolls in the hay. Surely this will not be forever, but for the first couple of months it will definitely work. 

• Kegel Exercise is also very important even after childbirth as stretched perineal muscles will likely cause intercourse and orgasm to be less pleasurable. 

Don't be surprised if you suddenly start noticing a lack of vaginal lubrication after giving birth. Reduced estrogen levels after pregnancy sometimes result in vaginal dryness, which can last up to 6 months. Surely this may cause some discomfort during sex. So in these cases you may want to try different vaginal lubricants or as I mentioned before, massage or oral sex is an alternative until you are more desirous. 

There are so many other simple things you can do but that may take me another post. In the meantime. Communicate with your partner, be honest with your feelings and continue to show your love and appreciation of each other.

Talk to you all soon.. and please feel free to share your tips on bringing back the Oomph in thr Bedroom after Childbirth.


Cheers!


Story also featured on www.jamaicanmommies.blogspot.com 
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Jealousy...The Damnations it may cause To your love life!

If you say that you have never been jealous at some point in your life or relationship, then I must say that you probably have never loved or been in love. I usually say that jealousy is inevitable. It happens in your family among sibling and parents..{you know like who is getting more attention or more allowance}. it happens in school with your friends and finally it happens in your relationship.

But is a little jealousy all that bad? I absolutely positively do not think so. I personally think that when I get a little jealous it only reminds me how much I am still crazy in love with my beau. But jealousy become a damnation to yourself, your partner and your relationship when it starts to control your mind and takes over your independent thinking ability.


When you realize that you are becoming extremely jealous, it means that there is a problem in your love life and you need to take drastic measures to correct it before it escalates. I know we sometimes suspect some "anky panky" with our spouse and instead of asking about it for clarification we start our little investigation. We search phones, wallets, secretly listen in on conversations, we even sometimes follow our partners our hire private investigators to record his/her activities.

All of this can be avoided sometimes with good communication and honesty. If you are the one suspicious of your partner let him know and talk about the reasons for your suspicions. If your partner is suspicious of you then as soon as you realize open up to your partner. I know guys have a way to get a kick out of tagging us along instead of just telling us the truth.

But I do hope that after you confront your partner he is truthful and you try to trust his words but if not then that's a different story all by it self.

Talk soon and do feel free to share your tips with us.
Nikx

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Ever Felt like Just Screaming?

Have you ever felt like your life is not really yours sometimes?
Have you ever felt like you want to crawl under a rock?
Have you ever felt like you are fighting a losing battle?
Have you ever felt like you can never do anything right?
Have you ever felt like you've just had enough?


If your answer is No then you are one lucky champ. In a relationship there are: Good days, Extremely good days, Sad days, Bad days, Not so bad days and 'I want to scream days'. Yea.. I know I am in a relationship and ladies you may agree that sometimes you just have to be a mother and wife for your man and child/children and it is just makes you want to hold your head and scream. Then there are other issues like bills, siblings, parents, in-laws, sex... and blah..blah..blah. Whoa!

Well the good thing is that these days don't usually last forever and it is good to know that it will be over soon.
As i always say God will never give me more than I can manage and i do try to use that to console myself when i feel a bit overwhelmed.

I am a woman, a mother, a girlfriend and I have been overwhelmed a number of times, but at the end of the day i realize that I have a beautiful family-my little girl who I love like no other, a spouse who loves me endlessly and a caring extended group of family and friends for support. So when I am down i try to think of the positives and Give God thanks for the blessing he has given to me.

But then there are others who do not have the support system they need, if you are one of them I advise you to find a channel to let out your anger, scream, cry, sing,write, dance, exercise, talk to the wall or talk to us here at My BedRoomScoop. Whatever you do, do not keep it in because that may lead to serious longterm depression.

Check out this weeks Video: According to you By Arianthi

Cheers Scoopers

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I Think I Love Him More Than He Loves Me!

Lately I have been conversing with a few of my friends and I realize that this  'unequal Love thing' has been infecting quite a number of people both men and women. Have you ever been in a relationship and feel like you are loving  your spouse way more than you are being loved? It may not be love, but it could be care, attention, loyal, in any case.. it makes you depressed and frustrated.

You most times feel unappreciated because you think that your putting in more than you are getting. At some point in any relationship we all do feel that way and I must say it is not a good feeling. I am a great believer in good communication and i believe that as soon as a problem surfaces in your relationship you should communicate it to your partner before it escalates.

Escalates? Yes, sometimes it's the tiniest things that lead to a big gap in the relationship and as such the bedroom activities become dull and dry. Feeling unloved and unappreciated is not a feeling that one should live with and I do advice every individual, man or woman to not settle for less than you deserve.

However, feelings could be wrong or misleading so please, please, please communicate and be honest with your partner and remember do not fight fire with fire, it pays to be humble sometimes.

Keep on showing the love, care and appreciation there is a 90% chance it will return to you.

Bless up Scoopers!

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If My Life Was A Song..

Sometimes I would choose 'Me' by Tamia What Would Yours Be?

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Forum to talk your mind is here!

Hey Scoopers!

You have been asking for a way to interact with each other, reply to each other's comments and share your thoughts instead of just commenting on my post. Ask no more because I have found a simple way to integrate that in the 'Scoop's Page'  in the form of a forum. All you need to do is scroll down to the bottom of this page where you see the Forum entitled "My BedRoom Drama". You can create a profile, upload links and photos, post a scoop, comment on other people's scoop and share the love.

This will not work if you don't participate so start blogging. My First scooper for the forum is "Bell" Thumbs up Bell!!... She is seeking advice on a problem she is having in her bedroom, please do not hesitate to read and share her pain withe the scooper's love.

In the meantime, you too can follow Bell's example and share your thoughts, joys, pain and frustrations. remember you dont need to use your real name of photo for privacy purposes.

One love My Scooper Family
Nikx

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